thots after prelims

well. prelims r over! was over last thurs, 2 days ago. bt i started playin a week ago!:P haha. physics paper 1 was nt as good as wat i expected. out of e 3 papers, i studied most for it but end up i tink it's gng to be the most badly-done. haha. yep.

after e paper, i pangseh-ed 04 coz i didn't feel like gng. a very big reason was coz e friday 2 weeks ago after econs paper, we went to eat. after tt kong2 they all wanted to go oasis. at first i didn't wan, bt hargao they all gng so i thot might as well go tgt. n i was waiting for matt n i went to fill my bottle, den hargao n kongkong they all, e 4 of them walked all e way in front of us. n they didn't even turn around or anythin.during e walk to e oasis, i felt tt halal ham n i were like unimportant ppl. n i dun like tt feeling. i thot e 4 of us shld be e clique, why did it feel like we were taggin them instead? i mean nt tt i wan to be in e lead all e time or anythin, bt why did they kinda "abandon" us? i mean durin eatin wen i said tt i didn't wan to go oasis, they already decided to go along, i mean nt tt ppl shld follow my lead, bt apparently, we didn't matter tt much to them. lol.

bt it's kinda a blessin in disguise? firstly, i listened to my mp3 n jus studied w.o caring bout wat they were saying, which gave me e time to really revise my physics n paper 2 wasn't too bad:P haha. n 2nd-ly, is e decision to nt go swensen's w them which gave me e chance to go back n find miss chia, talk w qimin n play bmt w qm, ch n chrismin yest! haha. yep. bt i didn't really mind a lot. everytime i feel affected by JC frens, i wld tell myself tt sec sch frens r e ones tt will last me for life. nt sayin JC frens can't, bt jus a way to lower my expectations n e disappointment which follows suit. yep. n so far i tink it worked!:P bt more impt-ly, is e reminder n e FACT tt JC frens r diff frm sec sch frens. e former cares bout stuff which e latter dun really n vice versa. e focus n interest r on diff things. yep. so i'm copin still quite well.

anw it's only another 2 more weeks b4 study break. bt of coz w it comes e bad news coz no more fun w 04, my clique n sch life. n of coz e A-LEVELS! arggh. yep. bt wat will come, will come. haha. yep.

bt well. tt day i jus decided nt to go, coz halal ham was a little touchy n she didn't wan to go n eat either. n i really dun wan to be taggin baby n hargao coz if halal ham didn't go, i wld haf to follow them ard. 3 ppl suck most of the time. n it sux more wen u're e THIRD person n u're goin out in a big grp wen there're other ppl ard n they're happily enjoyin themselves n u're alone. yep. n there's this teeny weeny bit of being affected by e bad performance for the physics paper. yep. n baby n hargao kept askin me to go bt eventually i jus didn't go. oh ya, n there's e money factor too. yep. they were really v sincere in askin me to go. bt i kinda feel scared after e previous friday's experience so i didn't go.

hehe. bt well. it paid off! haha. i met qimin n she suggested gng back rv, so i went w her. it's kinda i pei her bt end up i enjoyed it alot alot too! haha. n we met df on bus n e 3 of us went back tgt! haha. we ate the canteen food. went around to school to huai jiu4. tt feelin really felt great wen we jus spontaneously took turns to go "eh u rmb..." den e other 1 or 2 wld go "yayayayayaya!" haha. really miss e times in RV man! haha. yep. n there's e classic phagan's "den i turn HOR?" hahaha. luckily qimin reminded me of tt. n of coz the bonus, the fantastic bonus was talkin to miss chia!!!!!

haha. we saw her outside library n she's markin her students' CSE(china studies in english). haha. n she was damn kek, n i tink she jus decided to talk to us. n i tink we talked for an hour plus! haha. she really laughed damn happily. one of the most hearty talk i ever had w her. coz in e past, was consultation bout SSH qn. den after we left, i didn't really haf e chance to talk to her proper. haha. yep. n def it's coz of qimin n dianfeng. e 2 of them can jus talk random stuff. haha. n df takes hist like i do, so had common topic w miss chia. haha. yep.

n she really laughed. laughed. haha. some was laugh at us. bt there's also laughin WITH us. haha. yep. she told us alot of her students' jokes, like the whites in south africa, mr T. and vivian B. as e MALAY MPs. total retardedness man! hahaha. yep. n i tink my only joke 4 her was miss teo's "if i'd known it was you, i wld haf bang harder:P" hahahaha. damn funny.

mr chan joined us for a while too. n miss teo came to talk w her n totally suan miss chia. jus like hw friends suan each other, or rather more of jie n gor suan-ing me, got that "older bully younger" feel man!:P haha. yep. n miss teo's "bullshit!" wen miss chia said sth like she mark till brain nt working or marking v hard was DAMN classic and FUNNY! hahahaha. yep.

n most impt-ly is miss chia said tt she'll contact me like early nxt year or end this year to go back to rv n teach hist coz rv is in need of teachers n i said i was interested in teachin. haha. at first was thinkin only maths coz i think i can really teach maths, haha. bt hist is like.... haha. yep. bt miss chia made me seriously reconsider gng back to teach hist! haha. bt again. need to see whether got ppl wan to go back w me anot. i'll definitely go pysco qm, coz she seemed a little interested!:P haha. yep. e rest shld be nt much hope. hehe. yep.

n it's really a very very very enjoyable time there! felt like gng back to e RV days. n i so miss miss chia! haha. e consultations outside library. luckily last year wen i went back i did take photos of the library n outside lib area. got a lot of memories there lo! helpin miss chia in e library n askin her qn outside e lib. i guess i wld nv forget those times ba. yep. n some things once lost really would NEVER come back. or rather nt lost, bt over. yep. nv wld i get e chance to go back to those qm-phagan-me w e seniors days. my 4A clique's days. times w kaka. times bein crazy over mdm chia. times being crazy over miss chia. n w ancestor, norine. sitting w karen n tb-mate. matilda. tan kah kee. chenghui. badminton. really alot alot. only hope tt these memories will always stay w me so tt i can always feel happy.

this is e time wen i say tt memories are really a wonderful part of life. coz everythin changes, except them. haha. yep.

some experiences only get better, like tong n me after we left RV n went into NJ. bt many things also lose their quality, like my friendship w my clique, ka they all. yep. bt well. changes are jus part of life(: haha.

yep. n even if i go back nxt time to rv to teach, i still think tt i wun get e chance to talk to miss chia tt happily again. haha. yep. once. enough n tho wld still wan for more, but being practical n realistic, i noe tt i wld only get that once, i still noe tt that once is enough. haha. i mean of coz more wld be good la. bt even if no more, tt once is still good enough(: haha. yep.

n tt wld be e last time in e SA campus i think, n i wld be quite sad, coz my most memorable n significant years were spent there n even if e RV things dun change, like uniforms, teachers, juniors. e fact tt e campus is no longer there. things wld be diff. coz i associated very much w e campus. tt campus was jus special n unique. n of coz it's very much reinforced by e times spent w e PEOPLE. like even e bus-stop! haha. yep. bt well. i shall still say that i'll LOVE rv ALWAYS(i hope?:P). RV is really e most impt sch for me n e sch tt accompanied me thru my most special part of life! yep.

RV always(:

yep. n of coz after tt gng for tang yuan w qimin at clementi. n gng for badminton w her yest. w ch n qm. yep. haha. after yest den i really get REMINDED tt e friendship b/w qm n i hasn't changed much. i tink e confidence she has in me is so strongly built tt even wen we dun talk tt often over these 2 years, she still confides in me. yep. v touched. n of coz mus attribute to qm's character, realised she's really v nian jiu. like she's still in v good r/s w phagan n she did feel bad bout nt gng back to visit e teachers on teachers' day. yep. so i hope tt qm n i can haf a ever-lasting friendship too(:

haha. yep. n yest's badminton play was really good! haha. felt so empowered! hahaha. e play itself was jus fantastic. n seein my old zhan you on court felt really great. shall look forward to e nxt bmt play w e rest of e team after A'levels. oh ya. n meeting w coach rosie!:D haha. yep.

well. talked alot to gor nw. i'm glad tt i've found my focal point. hope he recovers soon(:

n recently haf learnt a very important lesson: not to judge ppl. it's really nt easy. coz ppl, esp e EGO me tend to think highly of ourselves n i wld subconsciously expect ppl to meet my demands. like i tink tt a mum shld be concerned over the child e way i want. bt recently i've learnt tt even if my mum dun love me e way i wan, it doesn't mean tt she doesn't love me, n more imptly, it's nt necessarily her fault for nt bein able to love me e way i wan coz my expectations are NOT the standards! yep. n it's really quite helpful in many many ways! haha. yep. so v happy(:

haha. bt today's session was nt really tt good. e children were v dead! n yest i saw yining and cherish in e toilets. den after tt wen they were gng home, i saw yining n i chiong-ed out of the conference room n i told her to come at 230. her dad heard n really brought her at 230. or maybe 240, bt like quite early. bt nt alot of ppl so she v quiet n shy. n cherish nt here today. so she a bit ku-ha-ha. yep.

n tho she still did held my hands v tightly wen i brought her to e toilets, sat on my lap n did her most classic smile wen she told me she flush-ed the toilet herself. she's nt so warm today. bt it's kinda good coz e experience wun be that good that i wld miss her alot over the next few days. i mean as in it's turning down frm e peak n nt bringing me to another peak. at least i wun miss her that much. haha. n realised tt tho i can play w her bt cherish is still e one that wld make her high. i mean same age ma. haha. wonder how 3 weeks ago wen cherish didn't come, she could play so happily w me. haha. bt yep. at least i've nt really "replace" cherish coz 2 weeks ago, she only wanted to hold my hands on e way to toilet n refused to hold cherish's wen she usually wld hold on to cherish v tightly! haha. yep.

n perhaps i shld haf jus took her grp during e big book prep n performance today. perhaps it wld haf been more fun. bt at least i saw how fantastic ziyong could be. he kinda was e most serious n performed best durin e reheasal n performance. i'm so proud of him! haha.

yep. bt well. yining still came to tell me she wanted to go toilet. i still brought her there n held her small hands(: haha. n she did do her usual clinging on to my hands in such a way that i have to trot behind her. n she did sit on my laps for a little while. did her shy "don't know". did her very sweet laughter(like e one on my dp now) wen she told me she flushed e toilet bowl herself. did walk over to me to ask me for e photo:P haha.

coz wen she first came in, n coz she's e only one. i could show her the photos that i've printed for her n cherish. haha. i'm glad i did it. coz that's probably e only way she can ever rmb there's this jiejie who really dote on her since she's k2 n wun be comin back anymore. haha. bt as tard say, i can still ask her back. so i'll call up her parents nxt year n see if she's willin to come back n whether her parents r willin to bring her back(: haha. oh ya. e photos story. at first i showed her she said "i don't wan". (bad gal!) bt after tt wen we were givin out e gifts, she came over n told me "you say you got photos for me" or something. den i teased her n said "i thot u don't wan?" n i even played w her n asked her if she knew which one was hers. haha. really damn cute. haha. n tong saw me being outrightly biased!:P haha.

yep. bt she ah. gave me false hope. she said she's 5 bt dunno if K1 or K2. so blur. haha. so i thot she's only K1, but her dad said she's K2 already:'( so sad. oh ya, forgot to ask her wen's her b-dae. haiz. yep. so quite sad she can't officially come back nxt year. wah:'(

n luckily i went out to talk to her. if nt i wun get e chance to hear her say her "byebye!" loudly again. haha. yep. but e best sessions n times w yining was really e 3 weeks ago one n e 2weeks ago one. e 1st w.o cherish n e 2nd w cherish ard. n yest wen i saw her in e toilet n cherish n her were being loud again! n wen they saw me, they jus went "ehhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!" haha. n i was so happy n i played w them! haha. n after tt i kept pullin back yining n dun let her go. haha. n after tt they reached the abacus class room, cherish still asked me to go in! naughty gal! haha. bt got tt little bit of mother feelin wen e 2 of them went into the class. yep. n daorui was in e room too. n he smiled so radiantly to me wen he saw me. i'm so happy tt he rmbs me:P haha. yep.

n luckily yest i went out to say byebye to yining, if nt she most probably wun haf turned up today. n today she didn't seem v happy. bt at least i saw her:P haha. v selfish of me:P bt today if she didn't come, i really wld be very devasted, def more upset than e me nw who's feelin a little ke xi coz today she wasn't v happy. haha. yep. bt at least she still bothered bout me w all e little things tt she still did today(as i mentioned above) n e most significant of all was she came to me to ask for e photo:P hehe. yep.

n wen tard asked her whether wld she give e stuff to cherish, she said "fliday!" n she was smiling happily, e most radiant smile tt i really like n she's sitting on my laps:P haha. yep. n she cannot pronounce "tomorrow" and "friday"!! she said "tomolow" and "fliday". aiyo. bt she tomorrow has dance lessons. in future can ask stalker go visit her w me!:P hehe. friday abacus lesson or sunday dance lesson:P hehe. bt provided i dare to go coz it's so weird to go stare at her outside class n stalker dun mind n i decide to find time. coz nw is muggin period. haha. yep.

n wen giving out e gifts, i didn't haf time for her, coz was giving out e name thingy that i did. bt tard was playin w her(: haha. n she did smile n did cast a few looks at my direction. haha. so i v happy(: haha. yep.

all e incompleteness i'll jus treat it as God's intention to help me round off my experience w yining in a way such that i wun miss her so much:P haha. yep. i'm sure i wun soon. coz i'm a heartless person.

but yining is really e most cute kid i've ever seen(so far:P). yep. n tho i closer to minjia, mus say that now yining is my favourite! haha. perhaps coz of her priceless smile ba. n i'm really grateful to stalker for managin to capture that priceless smile! coz tho today i took 2 photos w her, nt countin e grp photos where i stood beside her, that one was really e best! i mean she looked best there tho i might look better in today's photos!:P hehe. yep.

well. can only say that yining is really a God-given gift! a very special little girl in my life! haha. n honestly, it's her cuteness, sweetness, n sa-jiao-ness that i love her most. so maybe even if i've e chance to interact w her wen she grows up, i might not love her as much as i do now. haha. unless she still comes to me n sa jiao. haha. bt jus thinking hypothetically. haha. wun come true de la. haha. yep. bt actually i wld still be happy if she does rmb me even after she grows up. rmb that there's this jiejie who really really loved her. coz she isn't a very outstanding girl, so dun think anyone wld show her favourtism like i do. haha. so maybe i wld be e one who dote on her most:P haha.yep. bt of coz i hope that teachers will like her(: haha.

yep. i really cherish(haha) this experience w her tho i only noticed her on e 3rd week, n went crazy over her during like week 6 or 7. haha. yep. sweet yining(: haha. perhaps will remind as my best kid forever coz of her pricelss smile(:

yep. that's all. thinkin bout e past 10weeks. really feel quite upset that i had to part w her. but well. nothin is for life. haha. n i noe that i probably wun think of her that often soon. but i would NEVER forget her. i'm sure of that!:P haha.

yep. now only waiting for tard's photos! mus dig her blog out. if nt i can't haf e photos today! nt jus w yining. still got farisha. xinrui. grp photos n w e children. n yest's photo!:P haha.e friday class's(so sad that min khant refused to take w me alone! bleh) n yest e photo w stalker, vivien n samantha. haha. they're kinda my 3 fav juniors. haha. oh ya n nadiah. haha. e rest is like them, but these 4 more special volunteer-relationship w me. hehe. tho they aren't e closest to me considering andala n more recently, plus yaonian n aini n cheeyang. haha. samantha is like very special. she came in later that stalker they all but i jus share this special affinity w her ba. like her quite a lot tho we dun really haf a lot of interactions. hehe. n surprised but happy that she came back. bt xinhui didn't. haha.

yep. super happy that tong came today! i saw her coming in i immediately squeaked out LOUD!:P haha. den she's like "dun be so loud/happy or sth".haha. bt i was really happy. coz there's this part of me that's always looking for a repetition of things that happened in the past. like i always like to haf w miss chia consultations again, breakfasts w ancestor n bear they all, talkin on phone n sharing a very close relationship w sinee, n sittin at e bus-stop w yitong after gift! yep. bt some things would never come back again. only hope is nxt term coz no sch n tong wun be leavin overseas yet. i'm quite sure after she come back frm her overseas uni, sittin at e bus-stop after gift wld be impossible. maybe sittin at bus-stops after other stuff still possible, bt def nt after gift coz by then, maybe even I wun be gng for gift already. yep.

bt well. at least we still haf our mac studying now(: haha. n coz i like e feelin of unique experiences(as much as i can, n w ppl whom i really feel are important to me) i'm tryin to keep west mall's mac studying for only tong. like e others i wld try other places. haha. yep. n tho today tong didn't manage to take 98 home tgt w me, at least she came n i spent some time w her after sessions. haha. i'm especially sticky to her n stalker. i wld always lean on them. there's e safe n i noe-they-wun-mind comfort:P haha. or perhaps they mind jus tt they nv say?:P haha. n dunno leh, tho stalker n i aren't like BEST frens, i jus feel v comfortable leaning on her n stuff. haha. mus really say that she's my support in gift. haha. coz i'm closest to her in gift among all e juniors. n she's always there for me!:D haha. except that once wen they didn't come tgt n i thot they weren't comin gift ever again n made me so sad that i shed so much tears coz i felt so upset that they didn't even tell me they weren't comin gift again. yep. stalker!:D

haha. i hope our r/s wun change. or at least can last for a few more years? haha. seems quite impossible. at least a year? haha. yep. n i wld miss e stingrays! esp w them. n of coz w gift volunteers after sessions. e friday volunteers! i mean of this year first term. i tink my most enjoyable gift term working w e juniors was e 1st of this year. yep. n most enjoyable sessions will forever be e wed ones w tong. but a 2nd one is definitely this term, saturday! haha. yep.

haha. n tho i couldn't sit at e bus stop w tong, i went for dinner w stalker. e first time e 2 of us ate tgt alone. haha. yep. haha. v fun(: haha.

n i went to tink of it. n i guess perhaps things haf really been planned out. e first term last year was spent w tong at bus stops. den e 2nd term was w nadiah, walkin home n havin fun. den this year first term nothin much, except w shiyuan(: haha. bt also v good coz nw i'm still on quite good terms w shiyuan(: haha. n den this year 2nd term was w yaonian, discussin bout gift on our way home. 98 is such a good bus!:P haha. yep. n i mean saturdays. fridays almost everythin is w stalker. n these few weeks, plus haqeem n nadiah/yaonian n FC. haha. yep.

i dun like gng w stalker n nadiah coz e 2 of them dun haf much to talk. n it's different frm wat it's like wen i'm alone w stalker or w nadiah. haha. of coz it's a diff story wen there's another 1 or 2 more ppl, coz e show doesn't depend on me to run anymore:P haha. yep. n so perhaps God haf it planned out nicely such that i've been able to develop such good friendships w all these ppl. haha. yep.

n today's session tho wasn't that good. i still enjoyed it coz of e volunteers. b4 sessions, we were discussing n preparing. n we started playin erasers! haha. e one whereby u try to get urs on top of others in order to win:P haha. den after tt we played cards. n talked. n i tink partly coz tt day i talked more to joan coz only she, yongkang n FC came n yest i managed to talk to samantha more than usual n joan does give me a bit of sam's feel coz they're e quiet ones among those whom i can get along alot better w(nt tt they've problems but jus dun haf that chance to break the ice), today wen joan was leavin, i crapped alot. i mean i jus rattled on n on some rubbish. also can't rmb much. think she's wishin me good luck for A's den i heard prelims but my prelims over, den she said "ya la. so A'levels". haha. sth like this. haha. really v sweet of e juniors(quite weird to use on joan n yongkang but they're still younger than me:P so can use:P) to rmb our A's n wish us luck. haqeem rmb-ed both last week n yest n wished me. so nice of them(: haha. yep.

ya la. n i emailed e sat grp jus nw. coz i really enjoyed sessions alot this term. i tink no other sessions will be able to beat e wednesdays. coz tt time e children really did listen to e story. i had e greatest ever sense of ownership coz it's only me n tong n we could come up w stuns for them. n we were really close to the children. haha. yep. bt this term i still enjoyed coz e juniors' proactiveness n high standard haf really been an absence for quite some time, n there's e satisfaction of hoaxing candy, wendy and joanne and the sense of achievement in being able to control xinrui. perhaps control might nt be a good word? hee. yep. and of coz my dear yining(:

haha. yep. i think i typed for an entire soccer match:P haha. i mean my dad is watchin. haha. yep. shall finish up my dinner. haha.

yep. wld jus like to say gift has ended well n put me on a better focal point for A's. i mean at least i enjoyed n there's this sense of satisfaction of havin enough fun, n that's e no-excuse for me to start muggin for A's proper. haha. yep.

yep. yining, stalker, tong, tard, sat volunteers, friday stalker's batch volunteers(including cheeyang), saturday children and friday's min khant, sirui and felice. THANKS ALOT PEOPLE!:D

yep. n i didn't blog on my public blog coz it seems like it's really dead. haha. nobody goes i tink. so i dun wan to be like bloggin for myself to see. i dun like e feelin of no demand:P haha. yep.

yep. feel like writing "in loving memory of..." haha. bt tt's for dead ppl i tink. haha. yep.

n tho i mentioned "God", i'm a freethinker. n i tink i'm so weird. i believe there're ghosts but don't believe in gods. heh. but well. i dun mean to be rude. but such things is bout faith. yep. perhaps i jus dun haf e affinity now. yep. wait n den see.

yep. haven't typed such a long post for ages. haha. n never typed such a long but filled w happiness post for ages!:P haha. yep.

jus wan to mention again!

yining, stalker, tong, miss chia!

waitin for e photos to speak the thousand words.

1404(:
26/09/09

A for maths?

hmm. i tink i can't get my A for maths le. bt actually tt day wen i didn't manage to finish revising n compilin my summary notes, i alr told myself to aim for a B instead. bt after e paper expectations kinda changed coz e paper was really easy. hmm. bt jus nw reviewed my mock test and common test papers. w.o e careless mistakes i wld def haf gotten a B. so i guess this time round shldn't be a prob coz i only studied more n be more sure of my stuff. n paper 1 wasn't really a killer. bt hw m i gng to get my A? i realised i dunno quite a bit of stuff n there's always tt kind of qn tt is only wen u see n after seein e solution den u noe hw to do de. n dunno why, tgt, they can cause me my A!:( so i really dunno wat will happen.

bt yep. it's okay. still studied. go n revise my pure maths after this. den maybe slp? coz a bit drained to study hist le. bt i gotta study. coz i noe tmr i sure wun be able to clear if i dun clear my theme 1 later. wah. jiayou jiayou.

bt well. physics today was okay! now i noe hw ppl feel wen they struggle b4 exams. to me tt's kiasu-ism. bt today i realised maybe ppl like me. studied hard bt didn't do revision n it's tt kind of bu gan xin feeling coz u studied n u understand, jus tt u haven't finish recapping! yep. den i dun wan to coz of tt fail physics again. coz i tink i'm capable n deserving of a pass this time. well. tho there isn't really anythin to be proud of coz this is prelims n wat m i aiming for?

pass.

hmm. bt well. actually my aim was a C or maybe a B. bt i look at others. studied hard. understood stuff. practised n mugged. in e end still B. hw wld i possibly be able to strike a B given tt i only jus understood e stuff n haven't practised yet? yep. nt finding excuses. bt tt's wat i felt yest bt tt didn't give me an excuse to slack. tt only made me feel a bit sad tt i can't get a B tho i kept sayin my aim was a C, actually i hoped for a B. yep. bt well. at least mus pass. n i tink i can!:D haha.

yep. n i was totally elated after e test!:P hahaha.

yep yep. after tmr come hm study for hist. at 5pm on thursday, i wld be released! hahahahaha. yep yep. tho fri still got econs n physics la. bt nt so stressful coz is case study n physics is nt everythin memory work. n nt so sian studyin for it. n i dun haf much time to study for it either. haha. so quite good:P hahaha. i mean wen i dun nid time tt's good la. if i nid time like for SEA, good my foot. hahaha.

yep. i'm still amazed hw serena W. can flare up at e linesjudge in such a way.

i'm still a teeny weeny bit disappointed tt R. federer didn't win e title this time.

n i'm a little glad coz jus nw wen ancestor came, i didn't get e feelin of us tuo-li-ing. haha.

yep. n i'm still happy bout yining's photo!(: hahaha.

luckily today nv keep thinkin of her. if nt i really might be a little bit siao. haha. n pilophile(spell?)

haha. yep. bt i'm normal. mus keep stressin. coz i'm really normal!:P haha.

kk. tt's it! jiayou kheng! D-day coming!:D

1404(:
15/09/09

obsession w yining!

haha. i tink i'm really obsessed with yining! haha. she's really so cute n sweet! man! i'm gng to miss her! nxt week last session le, den dis week no session:( i'm gng to lose a great source of motivation coz no more sat gift sessions. i enjoy really is coz of yining! i go weekly w.o fail coz i wan to bring her to toilet:P hahaha. yep. n of coz go 4 other children. to help to control xinrui and to hoax candy,wendy and joanne. haha. yep. e volunteers quite comfortable to work w(: haha. yep.

haha. n stalker jus sent me e photo! oh man! this really captures yining's cutiest and sweetest look!! haha. man. mus upload!:D hahahah.

i really hope she's only 5 coz i wan her back nxt year! haha. yining!

yep. supposed to be muggin bt slacked jus nw:P haha. study after eatin!:) haha.

wat a pleasant surprise w this photo!:D


1404(:
14/09/09

proud of the canoeists!

oh man! i feel so proud of e NJ canoeists! winning e champion on an international level beating all e other countries! oh man! really damn cool! n i noe some of them! ha-ha. haha. damn cool! it's like international eh!!! haha.

bt of coz i noe e trade-off. their results. bt for this kind of honour n glory actually i tink it's worth-it. tt day mr han was still discussin in cls whether did they make e right decision to go anot. haha. luckily all their efforts paid off. haha. damn damn cool! i feel damn proud of them! haha.

bt cannot imagine e amt of money they paid jus to go there:S oh man. 120,000 eh! oh man. bt well. again. it paid off! haha.

wah wah wah! i feel damn proud of them. bt still wun feel tt attachment to nj. lol.

yep yep. rv. really hoping tt someone will go back to be relief teacher w me nxt year! coz i really really wan to go back to rv. can see my juniors. can see miss chia. n i jus wan to be back in rv.

haha. n e bookings for taiwan trip confirmed le! wah! damn excited! jus nw saw e iterary. woo! hahaha. really is like a good treat after A's! bt mus make sure i do well for A's first. i mean do as much as i can. haha. i wun use do my best le. coz there's no "best" actually. haha. yep.

haha. n jus nw talkin to my mum den realised my dad doesn't seem to be tt rich also. n my mum might be laid off again nxt year in june wen her contract ends. so i hope i can find a tuition n support myself as much as i can wen i get into uni(: haha. yep yep(:

kk. tt's all. really is study until a bit drained out le! bt i mus still go back to my books. in order to hopefully get my A for maths tmr! haha.

1404(:
03/09/09

exam blues

oh man. comp is hanging at this time wen i nid e time to study! argh! bt actually i wanted to come blog yest. bt went to slp at like 8pm plus. so didn't come. n nw come is coz of dl-ing e econs essays. actually i tink i wun haf enough time to finish studyin or to read anythin for e fact. bt i came to dl to send to tong. tho unsure whether she'll see it. bt i noe prelims results r impt to her n if this can help her if she does come to look for it in her mail. i shld do it. haiz. if nt i'll feel really guilty coz i noe tt prelims results are impt for her. haiz. wat a nice fren i'm!



bt i'm really a horrendous student. start revision so late. den nw struggling. haiz.



anw jie told me sth meaningful:



if you want to get an A, make sure u're an A student and not go in there and pray n bo4 tt ppl wun do well n push u up.



which i tink is true. which made me kinda of change my mentality.



n miss chia's sms! which made me so happy yest!!! hahahaha.



ppl always say they've faith in me. haiz. izzit jus da guan1 qiang1. or based on my past results. wat if i say my past results r luck? or at O's it jus coz rv prepared me well? if ppl really really think i can make it, den aren't i disappointing them? tho my results prob wun matter to them, but i feel tt i'm letting ppl down coz of their expectations.



n yep. these 2 reasons haf made me decide to be a true A student for A's. haha. hopefully i can be 1 by then. haha.



n e irritating thing is tt at such a crucial time, all e shows tt i've wanted to watch r coming up! like jia hao yue yuan n tong tian gan tan. i've been prayin n waiting for jia hao yue yuan to come up coz i wanted to watch it again. n after praying for 9 months. it's comin up at THIS time wen my prelims r takin place n my A's r coming! argh!!!



bt nvm. still e same old thing. wait till after A's den i'll chiong like nobody's business! anw i can watch jia hao yue yuan. it kinda fits in rather well except for 1st 2 episodes. which i can record n watch if there's e need!:P hahaha. yep yep.

k tt's all. go bath n mug le. jiayou kheng!

anw. actually exams r nth. i tink bout it. e only stress comes on nxt nxt thurs to fri. coz is hist afternoon paper den nxt morn econs case study den maths paper in e afternoon. 24h take 3 papers. bt in a sense nth daunting. haha. afterall exams jus get over as fast as hw my hols get over. e muggin time gets over v fast coz i always feel e lack of time to study. exams time get over v fast coz i always feel tt i dun haf enough time. i jus kinda feel a bit sian to take hist papers. perhaps coz i dun wan to disappoint e teachers bt i noe i wun. n really is all out chiongin tt time of speed n feelin tt i dread quite a lot. yep. bt tt's after hols. nw is concentrate on tmr's econs first. arghh.

yep. jiayou kheng! after fri's paper den come here n smoke n crap a bit:P hehe.

i still like miss chia's sms a lot!:P haha.

1404(:
02/09/09