Hehe. Gettin over e xu zi shan craze. Haha coz sch term resumed le so can't sit there n chiong pps. Hahaha. Supposed to b a mugger! Bt doesn't seem to b movin. See tmr! Jiayou k kheng!
Haha. Jus nw i epic-ly stopped half way durin e convo coz i noe my sis nt listenin again. Den i jus went into my 'emo' state. Den she asked,'den?' n i jus fu-yan-ly completed my sentence. N she started sayin she v sad she is losin e words w frens. Den started to give me her point of view. Den she suddenly asked why i emo! Haha. V funny isn't it? Den wen we were hm. She asked me why? She could pin-point which pt did i started emo-ing. Bt she jus couldn't see why.
I mean i dun blame her. Probably no one has felt e way i did or reflected to her. So can't blame her. She asked,' izzit becoz of me? No rite? I didn't piss u off rite?' wat can i say? Yes u did? Haha. I can only blame it on myself. Coz i dun haf e courage to jus thrash it out. I dun haf e strength to handle wat might come along.
I thot of it. Maybe is coz i wan hope ba. If i say le n she still treats me e same way. Wouldn't tt imply i m nt e least impt to her? If she changes. I will feel tt she is tryin so hard nt to make me emo. Wat for?
I m nt a victim. My happiness is nt controlled by others. N happiness dun come wen i m lazing ard n den it drops frm e sky. The few lessons i learnt yest durin 2105. Yep. So i m nt a victim. I noe. I aren't victimisin myself either. At least i dun feel myself makin tt attempt.
Yep. I put inverted commas jus nw coz i wasn't emo-in. I was jus unhappy. Probably upset w myself. Wat for? Why attempt to make tt comment? Tt moment wen i stopped myself frm continuing. I told myself i m nt gng to give my opinions unless i m being told to do so. I really dun like e feelin of talkin to e air. Wat is e pt wen e person dun process ur words.
My sis probably doesn't feel it. Coz she only catches e main words of my speech n she will give her viewpt of e entire thing. Perhaps it is coz i m gettin more trg or jus simply coz we r havin more one-to-one talks. Tt is why i m realisin tt she isn't processin wat i m sayin.
Tt morn b4 gg to uss i got real angry. She said, '因为我跟你不一样。你讲的话没有人会听的。' forgot wat was e exact phrasin bt pt was nobody will b interested in wat i say. Maybe a joke. Maybe jus to spite me coz of e things we were saying. Bt i felt tt tinge of anger coz i felt tt it reflects her true thots bout e things i say. I dunno. If she sees this. She probably will say, bullshit! Tink too much.'
Bt think again. Since wen did u really process wat i say?' i mean nt so exaggerating to e extent tt she virtually bypaases all my words. Bt she really hardly processes wat i say n make a proper response to it.
Yep. I m nt blamin her. Coz i tink it is fine. It's ok if she doesn't hear in depth. Coz i tink i haf my outlets of ventin my frustration. I haf ppl to talk to. Tho nt all might b as gd outlets as i imagine. Bt i kinda can still manage. Nt sayin 气话. I really mean it.
Yep. I mean i wun ignore her. It was jus tt at tt v moment jus nw. I jus told myself i shld jus shut up. I mean will definitely still give my opinions. Share my thots. Bt probably those tt wun take me more than 10s to elaborate. N i wun talk boit sth tt i really feel like sayin.
Like jus nw. I wanted to say tt i feel this tinge of inbalance in doelle. Prob wat my sis used to feel. I m nt sayin doelle can't balance or is insensible. Instead i tink tt she is very sensible. N really a v sweet n cute girl:) bt tt little bit of displeasure definitely still exists. At least frm wat i see. I really tink social work helps.
Tt day i wanted to say tt i really tink i feel improvement in kl. Feel v hopeful bout teachin her.
I jus wanted to find someone to share my joy. My sense of satisfaction. Bt i guess suan4 le ba. My traditional ways of ventin/sharin my emotions r probably e most tested/reliable methods.
I cannot. I really cannot take e kind of being ignored feelin.. Continue later..
Haha. Jus nw i epic-ly stopped half way durin e convo coz i noe my sis nt listenin again. Den i jus went into my 'emo' state. Den she asked,'den?' n i jus fu-yan-ly completed my sentence. N she started sayin she v sad she is losin e words w frens. Den started to give me her point of view. Den she suddenly asked why i emo! Haha. V funny isn't it? Den wen we were hm. She asked me why? She could pin-point which pt did i started emo-ing. Bt she jus couldn't see why.
I mean i dun blame her. Probably no one has felt e way i did or reflected to her. So can't blame her. She asked,' izzit becoz of me? No rite? I didn't piss u off rite?' wat can i say? Yes u did? Haha. I can only blame it on myself. Coz i dun haf e courage to jus thrash it out. I dun haf e strength to handle wat might come along.
I thot of it. Maybe is coz i wan hope ba. If i say le n she still treats me e same way. Wouldn't tt imply i m nt e least impt to her? If she changes. I will feel tt she is tryin so hard nt to make me emo. Wat for?
I m nt a victim. My happiness is nt controlled by others. N happiness dun come wen i m lazing ard n den it drops frm e sky. The few lessons i learnt yest durin 2105. Yep. So i m nt a victim. I noe. I aren't victimisin myself either. At least i dun feel myself makin tt attempt.
Yep. I put inverted commas jus nw coz i wasn't emo-in. I was jus unhappy. Probably upset w myself. Wat for? Why attempt to make tt comment? Tt moment wen i stopped myself frm continuing. I told myself i m nt gng to give my opinions unless i m being told to do so. I really dun like e feelin of talkin to e air. Wat is e pt wen e person dun process ur words.
My sis probably doesn't feel it. Coz she only catches e main words of my speech n she will give her viewpt of e entire thing. Perhaps it is coz i m gettin more trg or jus simply coz we r havin more one-to-one talks. Tt is why i m realisin tt she isn't processin wat i m sayin.
Tt morn b4 gg to uss i got real angry. She said, '因为我跟你不一样。你讲的话没有人会听的。' forgot wat was e exact phrasin bt pt was nobody will b interested in wat i say. Maybe a joke. Maybe jus to spite me coz of e things we were saying. Bt i felt tt tinge of anger coz i felt tt it reflects her true thots bout e things i say. I dunno. If she sees this. She probably will say, bullshit! Tink too much.'
Bt think again. Since wen did u really process wat i say?' i mean nt so exaggerating to e extent tt she virtually bypaases all my words. Bt she really hardly processes wat i say n make a proper response to it.
Yep. I m nt blamin her. Coz i tink it is fine. It's ok if she doesn't hear in depth. Coz i tink i haf my outlets of ventin my frustration. I haf ppl to talk to. Tho nt all might b as gd outlets as i imagine. Bt i kinda can still manage. Nt sayin 气话. I really mean it.
Yep. I mean i wun ignore her. It was jus tt at tt v moment jus nw. I jus told myself i shld jus shut up. I mean will definitely still give my opinions. Share my thots. Bt probably those tt wun take me more than 10s to elaborate. N i wun talk boit sth tt i really feel like sayin.
Like jus nw. I wanted to say tt i feel this tinge of inbalance in doelle. Prob wat my sis used to feel. I m nt sayin doelle can't balance or is insensible. Instead i tink tt she is very sensible. N really a v sweet n cute girl:) bt tt little bit of displeasure definitely still exists. At least frm wat i see. I really tink social work helps.
Tt day i wanted to say tt i really tink i feel improvement in kl. Feel v hopeful bout teachin her.
I jus wanted to find someone to share my joy. My sense of satisfaction. Bt i guess suan4 le ba. My traditional ways of ventin/sharin my emotions r probably e most tested/reliable methods.
I cannot. I really cannot take e kind of being ignored feelin.. Continue later..
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