:(

Today din start e day well. Slept at 2am. Alr thinkin of ponning morn tuition. Had 2 dreams. Snoozed. Woke up at 10am. Quickly postpone tuition to tmr. Hehe!

Den went for tuition den meet norine, kaka, den qimin along e way to ecp. Cycled. Ate. & came home!

E nicest thing today was laoban! :D & e food! Had fun talkin to kaka also! She was nice. Waiting for me! :D hehe!

Qm also did! Bt i tink sth really nt v right w me. I dun feel comfortable w her style at all. Haiz. Dun feel like sayin too much. Bt sth is wrong! & i'm disturbed! Nt doin her justice also, by havin such thots which den result in me behavin in rather rude & hurtin manners.. Bt well.. I'm nt quite sure hw determined* m i to change things. Yeah!

Love e breeze at ecp! :D shall pamper myself w a west coast climb & sea breeze on mon! :D b4 startin sch! Hopefully this marks e start of a different term, different me? Nt sure if i'll get down to doin it, bt, yeah!

Yep! & was listenin to my sis talk jus nw.. Jus feel v un-understood! As in nt her fault, coz nt many ppl can understand bah?

After this internship, i tink social work is truly service learnin. I learn so much as i serve & help ppl. It's meaningful & it really enriches my life! It makes me reflect so much bout myself tt i feel like a better person!

Bt well, wen proper work starts.. Izzit gg to b e same? I hope to find someone who is always interested to process also! Den can haf regular peer supervisions! Heheh! Hopefully my wish will come true! :D hehehe! In a nice way? :)

Yep! E pay isn't high, bt izzit tt big a sacrifice to go into SW? I tink it's jus tt u need a big heart!

I dun quite like my sis's "disapproval" in e sense tt she tinks i'm simple in pursuin wat i wAn, so i go into social work. Izzit tt i'm simple & able to look beyond e material aspects of life? As in there seems to b a negative connotation attached to being simple. Like i'm ignorant/oblivious to e real demands of e world. I guess there is always this element of me "wasting my talent" by gg into social work? Sometimes i do tink tt my talent can fetch me so much money in life, bt i'm nt! Sometimes i do wonder myself also whether m i wastin my talent! My blessed brain! Bt i tink God blessed me w a kind heart also. & in comparison, i tink my kind heart is more rare & precious than my intelligence! Yep!

Yah! My sis is at least nt putting SW down.. Bt jus feel tt she dun understan SW enuff & its impact/link w me! I tink there is this part of me who really wan to tell ppl who meaningful this IMH internship is to me.. Bt actually dun quite noe who to tell!

I noe it's so, coz on thurs, i tear-ed wen i was talkin to norine bout my confidence thingy! Bt it's again the, who will listen & truly truly understand me? I tink this internship has taught me true empathy - really feelin & thinkin in someone else's shoes. It's nt easy at all! & most ppl can't really do it i feel! Yep! I've found ppl who will listen, bt truly deep & long enuff to understand e intensity of wat i'm feelin? I doubt so actually! Bt gave up lookin for tt person, coz i jus feel tt there doesn't seem to b anyone ard now who fits e bill! Nt tt there isn't anyone who would listen, bt someone who really really is interested enuff to b seeing things frm my POV, i tink perhaps no one has e time/effort/interest! & actually i dun also! So can't b expectin tt frm ppl! Hehe!

Bt there was this desire to shout out e "who really understands me?" qn jus nw! Hahah! Nt really shout, bt ask! Yep!

Yest was still tellin AQ there all there's periodic depression everyone experiences! & today i'm experiencin it! Yest was i tired/depressed in e morn? I only rmb i was v happy during e JC clique outing! So my P.D seems to haf started today! Yeah!

Tmr 2 tuitions & meetin huifang e financial planner! Hehe! Hopefully will b proper rest after tt! & hopefully tmr wun b depressed! Heheheh!

Yeah! Today nv go tuition, at least went market w mama! :) hehe! Bt then stretched to tmr den haf less time for gor! Hehe! Bt it's ok luh hor? Hahah! Go earn money! Money is my big motivatin factor nw! & i'm quite motivated for tuitions actually! At least wun b whinin so badly like e past! :p heheh!

Yep!

Kheng :|